Don’t Stop Being Yourself, The World Needs You!

Please don’t stop being amazing. Don’t stop dazzling. Your uniqueness is more vital than you’ll ever realise.

You are a force, you are a presence. You are energy. Don’t throw away the power that lives inside you. Bandits were set in place to attack you from birth, but don’t let them leave your vault empty. What you have is more valuable than you can comprehend.

You can’t stop being yourself. You don’t know who needs you. They might need you in a way you’ll never know, and in a way they might never tell you. Sometimes your presence is enough. You might be the sunshine to that little leaf in someone’s spirit. Never think that conformity is worth more than helping a person find self discovery because of you.

The people of the world are dying in ways that are more than famine and disease. We are dying emotionally and mentally, and we need to step up and help each other. Strange powers have been trying to pound us to pulp from the days of the early ones, we just have to come up with a new strategy to be invincible. That is simply being who you always were. Being true to yourself, your desires, and your goals.

Let others watch you so they have something to go by. Authenticity always made the difference, and it always impacted lives. You cannot afford to throw that power away.

Shine in all your glory.

Priscilla.

@Queen_Pris

O-Town – The Reunion

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The most unexpected thing happened: O-Town, my teenage obsession, came back together! Excuse me whilst I have a defibrillator used on me, because this is the kind of news that only happens in movies! Snuggle up, get popcorn or some tea, and let me share my story of when I became and O-Town appreciator.

Back in 2001, as a starry-eyed 11 year old, I would wake up extra early during my summer holidays to watch my favourite show–Making The Band. I enjoyed watching the O-Town boys have their dreams come true and seeing the success. Then with the success also came the drawbacks. The scheming manager (who shall not be named), along with their schedules being spread thin… It all became too much. Either way, I felt like I was a part of that journey with them, supporting them from afar.

I also remember the countless hours spent watching the music channels waiting for their music videos to come. These were the days before YouTube, mind you! Then there would be me freaking out when the video would finally come on. Unforgettable. These are the moments that stay with you forever. I also remembered asking my mum if she could buy me their album, and I was hit with a fervent ‘NO’. Very sad times. I recorded it off the radio anyway and played it constantly, I got magazines they were featured in even though I’m not a magazine person! True dedication there. When O-Town first came on the scene, all the kids in my class were into Destiny’s Child, but I was proudly in to O-Town. I liked being different! Those years in my life had their ups and downs, but O-Town’s music kept me happy through it all. Sounds cheesy, but it’s totally the truth.

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Dan, Jacob, Erik, and Trevor are all genuinely kind and wonderful men. Ok, I may have never met them (yet), but it’s unmistakable when watching them and seeing them together. O-Town are more than a band, but a brotherhood birthed by musical destiny (Yes, I said it). I’m so happy to see that their bond has stayed strong throughout the years, that they are willing to share their bond, and their love of music with us once again.

And if their reunion wasn’t epic enough, *takes in deep breath* I will be seeing them this Friday in London! *screams* It still hasn’t sunken in yet, but I’m sure I’ll be bouncing off the walls soon. I’m sure it will be a wonderful night. Women (probably all of us will be over 20) all singing O-Town classics in unison. I’m sure it will be magical. Words can’t describe how fortunate I feel! Heck, I’ll probably write a post on the event itself! Watch this space.

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On the off chance that O-Town (or their representation) read this, I just want to say… Hi!!! I also want to say thank you for taking a chance with making the band and having a positive effect on many. You taught many, including me, what it means to be happy; and allowed us to be apart of something ethereal. For that, we ALL thank you.

Peace and love to all!

-Pris.

@Queen_Pris

Cabana – The Champion of Brasilian Restaurants?

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On a delightful, sunny day I decided to visit the Brasilian barbecue restaurant that is Cabana. This was the Stratford Westfield branch. Instantly met with authentic Brazilian decor, music, and smiling faces; I knew it was a good choice.

Taking a look at the menu, it is quite limited compared to most restaurants. You tend to feel as if there isn’t much choice. I decided to keep in mind that it is a barbecue focused restaurant and there’s only so many things you can barbecue or grill!

The lovely lady took her time to explain the menu to me and was ready to help me with whatever I needed. I went on to order the ‘Passarinho’ for a starter, which was fried chicken rubbed with seasoning and herbs. I also ordered Spicy Malagueta Chicken with sweet potato fries. The fried chicken was succulent, beautifully seasoned, and accompanied with a delicious sauce. The Spicy Malagueta Chicken was brought to me on a huge skewer which I found exciting, and I was even more excited when it came to eating it! I was further impressed by the juicy selects of chicken that were, again, well seasoned. Not spicy as claimed, but that’s forgivable. The sweet potato fries, of which were my first time trying, were delicious and well cooked.

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I took the time to try the house sauce, it was tangy, sweet, and with the right amount of spice. A wonderful complement to my meal. I would actually consider buying it! Yes, they have options for you to buy their sauces on the day! Genius. Quite impressed at that, it’s creative, and not what you’d expect. There’s also options of buying their cookbook, too. I sense a small business on the side here!

After all that quality food, I still had room for dessert. I ordered scoops of ice cream, which was heavenly. By this time, mind you, I was knocked out. Too much good food in one sitting takes a strong person, I tell you!

There were a few drawbacks, as any restaurant will have. I had to sit on a bench that had two levels to it as it was where two benches met, I found it quite uncomfortable so I shifted my table a bit. I also saw something in my food that looked a bit weird. It almost resembled spider legs to me, but I’m sure that’s not what it was. I was sitting by the open window, so it could have been something that flew into my plate. Who knows! I noticed this near the end of eating my meal, however.

All in all, Cabana is a wonderful restaurant with wonderful food and music. The drinks were wonderfully refreshing also. The atmosphere is ultra relaxing and you feel welcomed there, which is always important to me when going to any restaurant. I give Cabana a strong 8.5/10, I will definitely be going back and recommend it to anyone and everyone.

Peace, love, and good eating!

@Queen_Pris

Disclaimer: This is an independent and unbiased review, I was not sponsored to share my findings.

Forever Alone…?

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What do you do when you know you deserve a good relationship, but life keeps slapping you in the face telling you that you need to stop believing in fairytales?

Dating for me over the years has been.. Quite the experience. Though not as enjoyable as I would have hoped, there were a few good experiences along the way. Deep down I’ve always wanted to the heavenly, intensely beautiful experience that they call love, but keep getting faced with things quite the opposite.

My current situation is not as great as I would like. I have gotten to the point where I have decided that to an extent, I picked the worst degree to study–English Language and Literature. Where my class is predominantly women with the few awkwardly placed men. My chances of meeting a man that matched me well were almost laughable. Having jobs where there were mostly women did not help either. Yes, working with women gets loathsome, but the fact that you never really get to be around men is quite the hindrance.

The question then becomes, what does someone like me do about my dating situation? I’m not the ‘pub and club’ type, nor do I really have the social life I want. I have tried Internet dating, but was rewarded with men that were troubled and I mostly regret the whole experience. So, am I stuck? For a good while I didn’t think I even wanted a relationship. I was tired of the Jerry Springer-esque experiences and wishy washy men. You’d think that men would appreciate a good woman when they see one, right?? Hell NO.

Then there’s the unrequited love situation that I’m sure many can identify with. Pining after another who does not feel the same way… A frequent experience of mine. Writing about this even makes me want to fall into the springs of my mattress and never come out. It’s all quite unfortunate, really. Then there’s always that pep talk: ‘Oh you’ll find someone, don’t you worry!’ (Sometimes even from the person you want), and these words don’t encourage but make me even more fed up. I try to just forget the whole thing and act like it’s not as important as it is. The annoying thing is, you can’t ignore the desires of the heart.

My confidence and self esteem is unscathed, my worth is not depreciated by the absence of an enamored man. But heck, it would be nice to have someone sweep you off your feet and become your best friend. I’m sure that’s not asking for the world.

Peace and love,

@Queen_Pris.

The Career Struggle Is Real…

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How does one go about their future? What if you’ve gotten to adulthood and you’re still confused?

Yes, I may have a degree in English Language and Literature. Yes I may have years of experience in the glorified field that is retail. However, I have come to a point where I’ve realised that most of that doesn’t mean anything and doesn’t exactly get you places. I’m finding it quite difficult to choose a career path for myself and I’m getting more and more confused.

I am an intelligent, confident, and enthusiastic young woman but I just can’t seem to figure out exactly what I want to do. Retail is burning me out whilst graciously killing my soul. I have applied to graduate jobs, left with the impression that I dazzled them only yet to be denied. For what I would say were bogus reasons. Is there no place for confident women to be successful in society?

The office isn’t exactly the place for me as I’d want a career that I’d feel I was helping people or making a difference. I’ve been implored by family to try and become a teacher–which I ardently refuse. I always thought I’d be a singer as well, but I’ve seen a few things happen behind the glittery curtains that made me run for the hills. It’s still in my heart to do, but not with a corporate hand pulling all the strings. I am a writer, I thought it would be a sinch to find writing jobs and the like… Proved much more difficult than I expected. These last few months I feel I have been running around in a maze containing only dead ends.

Does talent, confidence, leadership spirit, positive energy count for nothing anymore or am I just doing something absolutely wrong? Heck, if I were being really honest, I’d say I needed a year away from everything, but my bank account would heartily laugh at such a proposal.

Life really is unfair, harsh, and cold. What can you really do? How does one keep their head up? Can I be the only person going through the same thing? I came up with a saying a few days ago:

‘I’m too talented and skilled to be broke’

The trouble is convincing others and having to convince them in the first place that this is the truth. I do have my fears though. I don’t invest in something for too long. I’m afraid of putting so much in to something for it to not work out in the end. When you’ve seen that happen with your relatives’ aspirations, it mentally deters you. Some would say, ‘oh, keep looking for jobs! You’re bound to get one.’. But when you hear bogus things like ‘you talk too much’ (that of which I don’t) and ‘We don’t think you’d be able to close the deal, or sell to businesses’ when that in itself is something that can be taught (it was an entry level job might I add); it makes you think: is this worth fighting for?

I just need to find a place that welcomes a person like me and has similar ideals to my own. But in this capitalist culture we’re stuck in, I feel like someone like me doesn’t fit in too great with all these places. There’s always someone looking to exploit or manipulate another. No truth or dignity. So how does one make honest money? For too many years I’ve maintained jobs that I’ve abhorred, but knowing I have too many skills to be stuck. The agony and frustration!!

Whilst trying to avoid spiralling depression, I do call out to the Internet stratosphere and ask for any advice that you may have or any opportunities you could point me to. It shouldn’t have to be like this for me forever. It just shouldn’t.

Peace and love,

@Queen_Pris.

It’s a Spanish love affair! – My Story on singing Spanish music

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This venture was never planned. Something of pure chance.

After my experiment at X Factor, being turned down, and realising a pattern emerging at the event; I decided I wouldn’t let that get me down. I came to the point where I dared to be different, dared to do something different. I wanted to amaze. I then came up with the idea to learn a song in Spanish and upload it to YouTube. I had no idea that within a matter of minutes that the maker of the song would discover me and seek me out. I was both shocked and touched. Seeing such a warm reception from Spanish speakers and receiving the appreciation of taking the time to learn their language (without any prior studying of the language). I would like to thank the Spanish speaking community for their ongoing support. It means the world to me.

I began to grow in greater admiration for Spanish music, flamenco in particular. I call it the soul music of the Latin world. It is a spiritual music. Authentic, true, genuine. I fell in love with it instantly. My soul was enchanted, I was never to be the same.

I will continue to teach myself these songs, it gives me a fulfillment and a happiness that I can’t quite describe. I find it to be my way of keeping in touch with Spain from a distance. My spiritual link. I miss Spain very deeply, and flamenco music is how I stay close.

How the people of the music industry perceive me is something that can go one of many ways. Some people might applaud me and spur me on, some might wonder why I would do such a thing. As I have also personally experienced, some people get intimidated by a black woman teaching themselves another language and doing it well. It is a spectacle, and they prefer to protect their current acts, rather than an ‘outsider’ taking their heat. If these people were smart, they would understand that my versatility is valuable and something to embrace instead of being intimidated by it. Life has taught me that anyone who sees what I do as something to fear isn’t someone you would want to do business with anyway. I’ve had producers even tell me that I came to the wrong country and I’d be better off somewhere else. I can only laugh at such nonsense. Many can say that I couldn’t have achieved what I have done so far, so why believe unbelievers? I will continue and the right people will eventually find me. Good help finds good people. Nothing will stop me loving Spain, the Spanish, and their music.

We’re in an age of artists being versatile, so why not do what people do not expect and to an exceptional level? Very few Black women singers are being signed nowadays, since we’re apparently not marketable to the rest of the world and it’s expected for us to sing well. I find this all as discriminatory nonsense. But I guess if you want to be successful you have to be unique and stand out.

Watch me do just that.

London love!

@Queen_Pris

A Letter To All My Sisters

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Don’t look to anyone for validation. Choose yourself, don’t wait for anyone to choose you. Accept yourself, don’t wait for anyone to accept you.

People’s opinions are only as valuable as you make them. What you say about yourself is what is most important. How God sees you is most important. Many people don’t understand your value the way they should, some might, and some will come with agendas. It’s your job to treat yourself like the queen you are, no one else’s. They can follow suit if they wish, but don’t completely put the responsibility in their own hands.

Concentrate on yourself, invest in yourself. There are some things that you can do for yourself that no one else can do, yet we rely on people to do it for us. This lands us in a dangerous place of vulnerability; and in the wrong hands we can be manipulated, misused, and taken advantage of. Some of us continue to put up with it because we don’t think we’ll find anyone else.

We as women need attention, love, appreciation, cherishing… But we tend to look for it in the wrong places and expect it from the wrong people. I tell you this, if you love yourself more than anything first, you automatically raise your standards of what you will tolerate. Rejection and abandoment do not strike fear into your heart or bear any blows. As cliché as it sounds, it really all does start from within. It’s progressive and can’t necessarily be done overnight, but when achieved, it is nowhere near easy for another to hurt you. It then does not become easy for one to question their worth when another rejects them. Self attained worth and validation acts as an anchor. You cannot be moved if you stand firm in belief of yourself.

I wish I could speak to every woman, I wish I could help every woman. But for now, I’ll do what I can. Continue to walk in the aura of majesty. Light and love.

@Queen_Pris.

Black Woman, Let Me Tell You

Let me tell you that you are more beautiful than what society says.

Let me tell you that you are more valuable than what society wants you to realise.

Do not think that all hope is lost and all doors are closed because of the melanin you possess.

You have unlimited power, unlimited intelligence and unlimited beauty.

Let me tell you about how your skin glistens in the sun. Let me tell you about how the sky needs you to feel purpose. Let me tell you about how the stars need you for guidance, and let me indeed tell you that the earth needs your aura to survive.

Banish those who don’t see it, expel those who don’t value you and ignore those who choose not to see you.

You don’t need anyone’s approval or validation. You were validated long before conception, and you are great regardless of who thinks they have permission over you.

Walk in authority, speak with power, and move with grace. Dump the masks that society gave you to wear. Burn the disguises that society says make you more acceptable. You aren’t to be altered, and you damned well don’t need to make insecure people feel better.

Let me tell you that I see you and I appreciate you.

@Queen_Pris

The Struggle Of Being a Black Woman in 2014

I may not be speaking for everyone, but I’m sure many other black women and even others have the same obstacles in life. Either no one will care about what I have to say or everyone might care. Regardless, there must be someone out there who will be touched by my words.

I am expected to be fearless, perfect, confident, and constantly happy when society tries to make out like I don’t exist unless I am depicting a degrading stereotype. Regardless of talent, intellect, and boldness, it is hard to obtain the rightful jobs that I deserve, yet another person with insufficient credentials can get the same job. I’m expected to look a certain way, adhere to a European standard of beauty; and if I’m happy looking just the way I do there must be something wrong with me. Fellow black people jeer at you, asking when you’ll join in with the self hate. No thanks. At a certain age, if you aren’t married or with child, there must also be something wrong with you. You are compared with your mother’s friend’s daughters and anyone else that seems to be more ‘better off’ than you. Since barriers to success for the black woman are kept so high, you are expected to have a ’9 to 5′, and wanting anything else is just absurd and a waste of time. Instead of being asked why you’re avoiding a desk job laced with racial politics and the imposition of ignorant ideologies, you are scrutinised for doing so. If your life choices do not meet the ‘house negro’ standard then you become almost an embarrassment. 

Regardless of your age (now this depends on your family’s culture) you are expected to be in the house at all times and guilt tripped or interrogated for even innocently going out with friends. You’re told that you won’t find a husband in the house yet going out is such a sinister act. You are expected to dress a certain type of way and if you go beyond it you are made to feel promiscuous, even if such a trait doesn’t exist in your energy.

Men are constantly seeing you as sexual objects and projecting their self hatred and insecurities on you. They make you feel like you’re the problem, or you’re ‘crazy’ for wanting to be treated better. They don’t treat you like you are worthy of true love because they don’t know what it is. You’re never really made to feel beautiful, only sexy, because that’s all society has taught us to be used for. Centuries and centuries of the sexualisation of the black woman hasn’t expired because it continues to be spurred on and some of us don’t help it, we encourage it too. Even for the sake of money and fame, which never lasts.

There are the black women that have never been mistreated and are seen as queens. Good for you. However, many are lacking the self esteem since they aren’t seen as queens anymore. Injustice of all kinds are done against us and nothing is being done and we are being expected to be silent. So many of us, including myself, are suffering in silence whilst this Kryptonian standard is being put upon us. We can’t be hurt, we’re meant to carry a whole family on our backs, be the mother and the father, accept abuse as normality because we feel like no one else will want us or treat us better. It’s a saddening mentality, yet the reality for many of us. Think of how our collective psyche is damaged when our own fathers refuse to be active participants in our lives? Then to go on to have patriarchally conditioned men mistreat us from toddler to the casket? Where’s our defence system? Who will right wrongs done against us? Should we not speak up and refuse to accept this generational cancer?

Yes, there will be some people that read this and think: ‘Oh, great, another angry black woman.’ You’re damn right I’m angry.  Angry and fed up that my sisters aren’t all operating on the level they should be. Every black woman is as majestic as Lupita, it’s not just her. I wish we could all remember that instead of comparing each other, competing with each other, and selling each other out to the enemy.

I wish that one day I can sit down, look at my life and say I’ve got all the help I need, people who understand me, and people who are willing to be down for my cause as long as I am. Too many of us aren’t down for each other and look for help elsewhere that won’t really benefit us like it should.

I’m tired of being made to feel like I’m invisible, not beautiful enough, not desirable enough, ‘intimidating’, and every other piece of nonsense that the ignorant of society have put in place. We should talk to each other and say: I see you sis’, and I appreciate you. We shouldn’t wait for anyone else other than us otherwise we’ll be waiting a long time and being hit with: ‘There’s nothing I can do to help you’.

The struggles of life as a black woman can be intense, but we don’t have to go through it alone.

@Queen_Pris

Abandonment (Part 2)

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How did he find meshe thought as she panicked.

A bald headed white man, aggressively came out of his black Lincoln, slamming the door with fervour. He was tall, athletic, and able to cause life threatening damage. He had a horrible scar spanning from the top of his eyebrow to the bottom of his right cheek. He snarled at the thought of having to pursue the one woman that managed to escape his deathly grasp. He started to run, Miranda caught a glimpse of him, turned around and managed to jump over a rusty trash can. She had to get away. She manoeuvred her way down the sparsely populated streets, zig zagged through the market stalls, and ran across the bridge near a park. She was hoping to lose him, she would rather die than be in his incarceration. She then ran over a second bridge. I’d rather jump off a bridge than be caught by that idiot, she thought with an overwhelming sense of survival. She looked back, he was catching up. He seemed not to be running out of breath. She always knew he wasn’t human. Miranda decided to waste no time. With agility, she quickly jumped onto the ledge of the bridge and made that life or death decision. She took in a deep breath–and jumped…

@Queen_Pris

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