What do you do when you know you deserve a good relationship, but life keeps slapping you in the face telling you that you need to stop believing in fairytales?
Dating for me over the years has been.. Quite the experience. Though not as enjoyable as I would have hoped, there were a few good experiences along the way. Deep down I’ve always wanted to the heavenly, intensely beautiful experience that they call love, but keep getting faced with things quite the opposite.
My current situation is not as great as I would like. I have gotten to the point where I have decided that to an extent, I picked the worst degree to study–English Language and Literature. Where my class is predominantly women with the few awkwardly placed men. My chances of meeting a man that matched me well were almost laughable. Having jobs where there were mostly women did not help either. Yes, working with women gets loathsome, but the fact that you never really get to be around men is quite the hindrance.
The question then becomes, what does someone like me do about my dating situation? I’m not the ‘pub and club’ type, nor do I really have the social life I want. I have tried Internet dating, but was rewarded with men that were troubled and I mostly regret the whole experience. So, am I stuck? For a good while I didn’t think I even wanted a relationship. I was tired of the Jerry Springer-esque experiences and wishy washy men. You’d think that men would appreciate a good woman when they see one, right?? Hell NO.
Then there’s the unrequited love situation that I’m sure many can identify with. Pining after another who does not feel the same way… A frequent experience of mine. Writing about this even makes me want to fall into the springs of my mattress and never come out. It’s all quite unfortunate, really. Then there’s always that pep talk: ‘Oh you’ll find someone, don’t you worry!’ (Sometimes even from the person you want), and these words don’t encourage but make me even more fed up. I try to just forget the whole thing and act like it’s not as important as it is. The annoying thing is, you can’t ignore the desires of the heart.
My confidence and self esteem is unscathed, my worth is not depreciated by the absence of an enamored man. But heck, it would be nice to have someone sweep you off your feet and become your best friend. I’m sure that’s not asking for the world.
Peace and love,